Healing

The soul is healed by being with children. 
English Proverb
I have decided to give myself a challenge. 30 pictures and quotes of the moments in life that matter most. Too often I let time or days pass before I pull out my camera and take a shot of my little love. 
My soul is healed by this little gal. Every day my heart is deconstructed and reconstructed because of what she does to me. She helps me to see my areas of weakness, struggle, selfishness, exhaustion, and lack of joy. She helps me to take moments to laugh, be still, and look at everyday things like flowers and bubbles and I puppies. I am pushed to the limits for her. I get tired of her clinging at my leg when I try and cook dinner. I see my heart being transformed by the difficulties being placed in front of me. I am more aware of my mouth when I let out a curse or talk about someone. Being a mother is a challenging task for me. Yet, I see how the work and mess and struggle is changing my heart, for the better.
The other day I was put in timeout by my husband (I literally asked him to do the whole process with me- the same way I discipline Lillian), because I lost my temper. I realized in doing so I hurt my daughters feelings and made her feel insecure about my love for her. I had no reason to lose my temper other than she inconvenienced me for a moment. I was humbled, humiliated, sorry, and ashamed. I know this won’t be my first and last parent mistake where my heart is revealed by my daughter. I hugged her after, and was so grateful for her.
Love is a powerful tool. Only love cleans up gross things like vomit or runs with compassion to a child who falls off the swing. It is amazing what these little children do to our hearts. They are one of our greatest tools for exposing our sin and our need for God.

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