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My life chaos

Let me share some things that happened this week:

Our power went out, so I ate left over cold pancakes.
I wore slippers to the dentist. And forgot to brush my teeth before.
I had banana in my hair for almost two hours before someone pointed that out.
I left my keys in the door on the outside.
I enjoyed vanilla ice cream and wine in the same sitting.

My days have gotten crazy. I am staying at home with Lillian currently so I have no excuse to forget plans or not have my house looking pristine. But most days usually look like me as a frazzled mess and my daughter in her pajamas still at 3pm.

For example, last week I had made plans to go with some friends to brunch at one of my favorite little restaurants. I knew all week about it and looked forward to it. Then Saturday morning rolled around and I got up and decided I wanted to make breakfast with my hubby. We had walked to the store in our PJ’s and came back with all the supplies. Then I get a text that the table is reserved for a half hour later! What was I thinking?! I rushed into the shower, half blaming my husband for not reminding me of my plans and also cursing at myself for getting so absent minded.

See, having a daughter has made my life so busy. But I am never sure what it is that keeps me so busy. Yes, we go on walks and to the library and meet moms for baby dates and then there are errands to do and chores to keep and oh yeah- exercise and my quiet times! Yet normal, working people do all this plus have social lives and kids. So what is wrong with me?

After beating myself up for a week about it and deciding to get a calendar I came to a realization. There aren’t “normal” people. I made this concept up. I am comparing myself to something that doesn’t exist. I gather ideas on pinterest and feel defeated knowing I might do one this year. I compare myself to the top cooks, gals with toned bodies, and moms who do it all. The bottom line is there aren’t enough hours in the day to do it all. If I did, I would miss the precious moments that creep up on you. Life happens. Things come up that must be dealt with. My daughter wants to play or my hubby wants to chat. I want to be engaged. I need to stop focusing on the illusion of what I want to be and just be me.

With all this said, I better go. After typing with one hand for so long holding my baby I think it’s time to give her my full attention. 🙂

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